| Overall Grade: |
D+ |
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| Story: |
D |
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| Acting: |
C+ |
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| Direction: |
C |
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| Visuals: |
C |
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What Will William H. Macy Do Next?
by Shane (movies profile)
Apr 14, 2007
1
of
1 people found this review helpful
Wow. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. Alot of the movie just progresses into "what can we have William H. Macy do next?”
He starts out as a typical square in a suit. Inexplicably, and I mean 4 minutes into the film, he tells his wife he's leaving her and goes on about the town. He starts up a conversation with Joe Mantegna in a bar and we hear ***** dropped about 6-8 times. He tells Macy he needs to get laid and gives him a card for a sex club called Allegro. In the club, Denise Richards bops her head up asking Macy to "buy me [her] a drink". Its $100 and he refuses. "That's too much" he says. Really though it seems he's more upset with the fact that half the money goes to the club. Escorted out, he then proceeds to a peep show. The girl convinces him to give him $10. He only has a $20 so he gives that to her with the intent that she "will make change"
"How does this *****ing glass come up?" he asks. Suffice to say, he leaves the show early, still yet to find release. His next stop is a side corner card game. He bets $50 and after failing to guess which one of the 3 cards was the spade, he loses his money. Ofcourse. However, Macy wants to make a big deal of it. "show me your cards"...as one would expect he is beaten, taken round back, and beaten some more before he is eventually robbed of everything but his wedding ring. (guess they missed that)
Still bleeding, he stumbles into a pawn shop, and has a humorous exchange with the clerks enquiring on "how does it [pawning] work?" He pawns his wedding ring, buys a WWI survival knife and ventures back forth into the breach. Staring at a poster for whores, he is greeted by a shady pimp. (as if there is any other kind) "That place is closed" he says. The two then haggle the price of a ***** while proceeding round back of an alley where the pimp pulls a knife on Macy. "Give me all your money mother*****er!"
Macy pulls his newly acquired combat knife and slices the "coon". There’s about 2-3 minutes of him just beating the ***** out of this guy and shouting one racial slur after the other. I thought it was pretty funny, but that's me.
Now he's done. He's released, climaxed, came, orgasmed. The entire movie up to this point was one big jerk-off. Right now he's on a euphoric high, feeling more alive than he's ever been. He strolls into a coffee shop where he meets the waitress Julia Stiles. Jolly and on the verge of song and dance he tells Stiles. "I want to ***** you"
The scene ends and cuts to post-sexual intercourse with Stiles. If you're wondering, all you'll get is some panty ass and side breast here. Anyway, he's telling her how he cut up the ***** and tries to share with Stiles this new enlightenment he's found. "You know who I hate?" she confesses. "Faggots!" and they continue on their discussions. The entire time, Macy is wielding the same knife he used to cut up the pimp less than 15 minutes ago in the film. Things are looking good until Macy asks Stiles to say she's not really an actor, but a waitress. She gets upset and goes for her meds. Things escalate until Macy finally unleashes the same visceral rage he unleashed on the pimp. Blood spatters all over his face and Stiles screams. She stops. End scene.
He's on a train admiring the hat of an elderly black woman. "I like your hat. My mother used to wear one just like it." She ignores him and he becomes hostile pulling out the knife and all. When he exits and tries to enter a black church he is stopped by the woman and a police officer with accusations of attempted rape. He doesn't have any ID (the muggers took it), and the officer frisks him to find a knife. He's taken in. An interogation scene not all that unlike the one from Bubble. The two exhange words about the woman and how he had no intention of raping her and Macy promises to "make it right". The detective then asks "so why'd you kill the girl?"
Incarceration time. The film has about 18 minutes left. We witness Macy getting escorted, naked, into his cell as the block showers him in whistles and tissue paper. He meets his cellmate; a big, burly black man (Bokeem Woodbine). He starts on a nervous rant about how white people are isolated and scared. Woodbine doesn't say much until he's done. "so....you gonna get on my body?". Macy's confused, as am I. Woodbine clarifies: "Are you gonna suck my dick?" He then realizes it's a rhetorical question. Scene cuts with Edmond curled in a corner staring up at the masculine negro. He's now in a visitation room with a priest. He admits to having been sodomized and goes on a rant questioning god.
The film cuts a few years and we see a bald, biker mustached, tear drop tattooed Macy writing letters. Light's out, he's talking with Woodbine again with his psuedo-philosophical insights. The movie ends as the two cuddle up together in the same bunk.
Through the film there are images of tarot cards. In the first scene of the films he’s given a slip of paper with his re-scheduled appointment; 1:15. On his way home he comes by a shop; 115. He enters and gets his cards dealt. “You’re not where you belong” the lady says. The rest of the film we see these cards spring up in the mind Macy. The card for Allegro, Mantegna gives Macy in the bar, the card game, and I think one in the peep-show. His cell is 1:15 also. When it cuts to biker stached Macy, we see he has a tattoo of one on his arm. His final rant speaks of determinism and destiny and how animals were sent here eons ago to watch over us, inane ***** like that.
The movie has a brisk hour-ten runtime and up until minute 50 the pacing was excellent. As for the film on a whole? Dreadful. It's a must watch just to see Macy cut Stile's throat, launch into a racial tirade, and in the end...become a homosexual biker daddy. Just don't expect the movie to make sense. |
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