| Overall Grade: |
C- |
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| Story: |
B+ |
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| Acting: |
D |
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| Direction: |
D |
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| Visuals: |
B |
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Little Engine that Just Couldn't
by John (movies profile)
Mar 10, 2008
129
of
236 people found this review helpful
Tristan and Isolde
This movie reminds me of the age old story of "The Little Engine that Could". While watching Tristan, I kept thinking at the actors where telling themselves "I think I can, I think I can" but in the end, they just could not pull of a good movie. This movie was ruined from the beginning but did offer moments of hope with some very well done action sequences, however in the end the scripting and acting just murdered this movie. This movie kind of actually reminded me of Troy in the fact that you have the stereotypical shirtless scenes with GQ models as the main characters with pearly white teeth. Troy was Beverly Hills 90210 Meets the Trojan Horse, Starship Troopers was Beverly Hills 90210 in Outer Space and Tristan and Isolde is Beverly Hills 90210 in the Medieval Times. The director tried so hard to give a movie that has the gritty scenery and architecture of the medieval times but then brings us a cast that is more concerned with trying to sound Shakespearian while not being able to deliver the lines correctly. The acting was very good by both Tristan who is played by James Franco from both of the Spiderman movies, and his adopted father Mark played by Rufus Sewell is as always in his stellar best, but everyone else does just a terrible. Hearing Isolde deliver her romantic lines is like hearing an amateur in an audition for a Shakespearian play. There is no passion in her voice and she appears to be acting instead of thrusting herself into the romance that the movie is commanding. The script is just no less than terrible and the lines the actors are supposed to deliver are catastrophic. Once again, the movie gives Gen X lines with lackluster passion. It is possible that this movie could have been saved if the script did not bounce between the "Thous and These" and "This and That's" like a schizophrenic kid without his medication. There is absolutely no consistency with the dialogue, which again is the director and the writers fault and not the actors.
Tristan and Isolde is the story of two lovers who are thrusted into a love that was never meant to be. Tristan comes from the English small country which is being invaded by the evil Irish warlords. After a small battle, Tristan is killed and sent out into the ocean on a small boat that is lit on fire. (Yes, for some reason the shrubs never burn after seeing the whole boat engulfed in fire) The boat lands on the shores of Ireland, right on the front door of the English enemy. Isolde finds Tristan's body and realizes that he is still alive. She doctors him back to health in secret and through a series of very quick and unromantic events, she falls madly in love with one another. Again we have no feeling for the characters because of the speed and quite oddness of the relationship. We are led to believe that these to are head over heals in love, therefore I will give them the benefit of the doubt. I do not want to ruin the movie by telling you too much of the plot but it is important that you do know that it is a Tragedy. This was legend was supposed to be the inspiration behind Romeo and Juliet written by none other than William Shakespeare.
Giving Tristan and Isolde some credit, I have to say that I did actually enjoy the battle sequences. I thought they were very witty and realistic. Maybe even too realistic for your typical PG-13 movie. However there is one scene taken directly from the WWIII movie "Red Dawn". All of you Red Dawn lovers will know exactly what I am talking about. The movie does try and paint a gritty and realistic feeling but this is overshadowed by the terrible acting or overly good looking heroes in the movie. I cannot give this movie a complete bomb because it does have some engaging scenes that do draw you in and give you hope but at the end of the movie you just kind of realize that "Hope Floats" away.
2 of 4 Stars for a completely noninspiring and nonromantic romantic movie.
Warning to Parents: PG-13 may be a bit mild because of the Violence, however the violence was pretty good. This movie also could have been renamed "How Isolde Got her Groove Back" because she is in bed with either Mark or Isolde over 5 times in the movie. You do not see any nudity but you do see the motions and near naked scenes quite frequency. |
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