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Try not to be too surprised, but in the perfectly-coiffed, litter-free, well-apportioned world of upper class suburbia, things are not as blissful as they seem.  I know, I know. It’s a jaw-dropping revelation, isn’t it? At least that’s what director Arie Posin and screenwriter Zac Stanford seem to think in Chumscrubber, a smug and tired combo of American Beauty and Elephant and Heathers and Desperate Housewives­ that wants you to sit down and take your metaphorical medicine. 

Before the movie starts pissing me off again and I begin obsessing on the negative, I will admit that Posin comes across as a confident director. He clearly knows what he wants and is not afraid to want something outside the norm. But he directs like someone whose head is chock-a-block with half-baked ideas about symbolism and adolescence and crane shots and computer graphics. It’s like he figures Chumscrubber is his shot at the big time so he barrels through the playbook with abandon. At least in the similarly themed Donnie Darko, all that showing off was in the service of an original story, wrapped in its own brand of oddness. Here, Posin gives us a whole song and dance to tell us lots of things we already know.

High schooler Dean (Jamie Bell) is at that crucial teenage nexus when your parents are losers and nobody understands better than you how much the world totally sucks. Living in an upper class, bland, Southern California cul-de-sac, Dean walks into his best friend Troy’s bedroom and finds him hanging from a noose. Unable to express any grief over his friend’s death and egged on by his father, an insufferable self- help author (William Fichtner), Dean becomes sullen and broody.

At school, Dean discovers that schoolyard tough guy Billy, pretty Crystal (Camilla Belle) and slacker chum Lee (Lou Taylor Pucci) have been the happy recipients of Troy’s endless supply of happy pills, the kind that adds psychotropic color to their colorless childhood. When Dean won’t reveal the location of Troy’s stash, Billy and his gang kidnap Dean brother, Charlie. The problem is, Billy kidnaps the wrong Charlie, instead snatching the son of an interior designer (Rita Wilson) so obsessed with her impending nuptials to the town mayor (Ralph Fiennes) that she doesn’t notice her son is missing.

Over the course of its 108 self-important minutes, Posin takes us around the neighborhood. We meet Troy’s mother (Glenn Close) who has taken to knocking on everyone’s door and personally absolving her neighbors of her son’s death. By the end, the movie doesn’t even have the conviction of its own cynicism. Dean finally expresses remorse over Troy’s suicide and Troy’s mother learns to move on.

Chumscrubber’s problem is that it’s about everything and nothing at the same time. Even the title yells “take me to Sundance and love me.” And what’s with that stupid title anyway? The Chumscrubber is a videogame character that runs around with his head tucked under his arm. Because you see, class, adolescence is a time when you’re disconnected from your body, your mind, your loins, seeing things from a new and confusing perceptive. And what’s with all the adults. Why are they so clueless and inattentive? Because you see, class, parents provide food and shelter for their children, but they’re too old and self- absorbed to help navigate the confusing waters of pre-adulthood. And what is it with this great cast? Do they think they’re in a comedy or a drama? Sorry, class. I have no idea. 

The Video: How Does The Disc Look?

This 2.40:1 transfer features bright colors and good clarity, which makes for a satisfying picture. The palette is wide and well rendered, with strong pastel hues and accurate, natural flesh tones. I was not a fan of the softness, but only rarely did it detract from the presentation. Detail was above average, as was the shadow detail encased in solid black levels. Edge halos were minimal, as was the layer of grain that permeated the transfer. A good transfer, but not a great transfer.

The Audio: How Does The Disc Sound?
 
The Dolby Digital 5.1 track creates an agreeable soundscape that matches the visuals. The mix only gets aggressive during the rock music interludes and the sounds that accompany the Chumbscrubber videogame. In both instances, the sound is crystal clear and confident with good spread across all channels. Otherwise, this is a fairly quiet mix, although there’s a nice depth and gentle force to the ambient sounds and dialogue. The surrounds don’t do a lot, mainly reinforcing the heavy elements in the music and videogame passages. Dialogue is solid, never sounding edgy. In all, a wide and pleasing front channel experience makes up for the okay use of the surrounds.

There is also a Dolby Surround 2.0 track and English, French, and Spanish subtitles.

Supplements: What Goodies Are There?

The supplements have rental written all over them, which is appropriate since the movie is not worth buying.

First is an audio commentary by director Arie Posin and screenwriter Zac Stanford. It’s an amiable commentary, but I was hoping for more insight into how they assembled the amazing cast, how hard and/or intimidating it was to work with these performers, and what it was like to be handed a decent budget for a first film. Otherwise, Posin does most of the talking and he gets into production design and script details that are mildly interesting.

The Making of The Chumscrubber is a bland, cookie-cutter 12-minute featurette. Producer Lawrence Bender had the script originally and took it to fellow producer Bonnie Curtis. She and Lawrence were both impressed by director Arie Posin, who got the job. If you find that interesting, then this is the featurette for you. Jamie Bell is interviewed ho-hummingly explaining what his character goes through. Camilla Belle also chimes in from the set (Get it? Belle. Chime.), as does Carrie Anne Moss. Posin says he was motivated by his Russian filmmaker father, who believed the best movies explore parts of the culture that need a spotlight shined on them. Hence, The Chumbscrubber, which boldly tells us that suburbia has a dark side.  It’s standard EPK material.

Next are Deleted and Extended Scenes. There are ten scenes in all, and each looks like a strong workprint with audio that incorporates some side speaker action. All these snippets are out of context and could have used a Posin audio commentary to fill in the blanks. Most of the featured performers are accounted for, including Carrie Anne Moss, Ralph Fiennes, and Jamie Bell.