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After been teased by the eerie theatrical trailers that ran for Cold Creek Manor last fall, I now want to ask for the 119 minutes of my life back I just spent watching this pedestrian, by-the-numbers thriller. It wasn't that the trailer was so terrific, but it did seem to promise some sort of supernatural goings-on or at least a spine- tingle or two. But Cold Creek Manor offerings nothing of the sort except for a few blowing curtains and ominous lightning flashes. It is really a throwback to the neutered-male thrillers popularized in the late 80s and early 90s (Fatal Attraction, Unlawful Entry, Pacific Heights, to name but three), which were themselves descendants of the granddaddies of the man-versus-primal-instinct epics, Deliverance and Straw Dogs. All featured a group of well-fed, white-bread city folk who mistakenly venture into the great untamed wilderness (or at least the suburbs), usually in hopes of a little peace and quiet. Instead, ol' mother nature bites back, albeit in man-sized form - either an inbred local, a psychotic authority figure, or spurned ex- girlfriend/tenant. While this time-worn plot may have worked like gangbusters in the 70's, and less so in the 80's, by now it is so antiquated I kept looking at the back of the jacket box, because I was positive Cold Creek Manor was made in 1993, not 2003.

As directed by Mike Figgis (Timecode, Leaving Las Vegas), Cold Creek Manor certainly looks good and delivers all of the cliches we expect. The opening sequences are suitably eerie, as Quaid, Stone and their two tots creep around the dusty ol' manor, while lots of scary music plays on the soundtrack and the family is attacked by inanimate objects (a curtain, a window frame, etc.). Sure, I am always a sucker for this stuff, but when Dorff shows up as the resident town psycho, I was disappointed. If you are going to set up your film as some sort of haunted house flick, then at least give me some ghosts, rotting corpses from the grave or Haley Joel Osment. Otherwise, by the time we reach Cold Creek Manor's ludicrous and plot-hole-filled finale, all a poor reviewer can do is count how many times Stone screams out Quaid's name, like counting sheep to fall asleep.

Sure, I've seen far worse thrillers than Cold Creek Manor, but also far better. Its only real crime is that it is perfectly ordinary. So rent it only on a Saturday night if your local video store is out of The Sixth Sense, The Others or The Ring.

Video: How Does The Disc Look?

Cold Creek Manor is not particularly scary, but it sure looks good. Presented here in 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen, it sparkles just like a new movie should. The print is in excellent shape, with only a slight bit of intentional grain present. Blacks are rich and deep and colors nicely saturated but not overdone. The film has a nice, sun-drenched look during daylight scenes, and is more subdued and somber during the dark interiors (usually punctuated only by flashes of lightning). Certainly, this film's rainy-night finale will test how well your monitor is calibrated, as much of it is quite dimly lit. But shadow delineation and detail are very near perfect - only in a few select shots did I have trouble discerning what I was looking at. There are also no compression problems nor any visible edge enhancement. Very nice.

Audio: How Does The Disc Sound?

While I found Figgis's own clunky score rather annoying, this is still an effective soundtrack. Both the effects and score are bass heavy, which is nicely rendered by the strong .1 LFE channel. Stereo separation across the fronts is also very expansive and engaging, and dialogue, even whispered, is clear and distinct. Only surround use could have been more aggressive - many scenes I hoped would envelope me just sort of laid there like a soggy ghost. Oh, well, not too shabby nonetheless.

A French Dolby 5.1 dub is also included, along with English and Spanish subtitles and English Closed Captions.

Supplements: What Goodies Are There?

While not overflowing with spectral goodies, there area few fun extras here. First up is Mike Figgis' screen-specific audio commentary, and to his credit (or fault, depending on your point of view) he takes this absolutely serious. THere is not a lot of mirth and merriment here, and Figgis is pretty dry and technical. But if you care about this movie or the conventions of the genre, which Figgis discusses at length, it is worth a listen. OTherwise, you will snooze.

Next up are two short but better-than- average featurettes: "Cooper's Documentary" (8 minutes) and "Rules of the Genre" (9 minutes). Yes, they are brief, and a mix of the typical on-set footage and interviews, but the editing is sharp and snappy and at least all involved tried to make a good thriller. I didn't learn anything new that wasn't in the commentary, but this is the way to go if you don't have another two hours to kill.

Also included are eight deleted scenes and an alternate ending, with an introduction and optional commentary by Figgis. Par for the course these days, nothing here is a standout, nor is any of it bad. Only the alternate ending is interesting, which wraps up everything far better than the film's current ending, although it is pretty touchy-feeling. The quality of the clips is fair, with all presented in somewhat dark and murky 1.85:1 non-anamorphic widescreen.

Rounding out the extras are the usual Buena Vista Sneak Peeks, although no actual trailer for Cold Creek Manor.

DVD-ROM Exclusives: What do you get when you pop the disc in your PC?

No real extras here, just the usual pop-up interface with DVD controls and weblinks, and the opportunity to register your DVD in Buena Vista's handy exchange program.

Parting Thoughts