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Gigli is one of those gigantic box-office stinkers that is both gloriously awful and nowhere near as bad as the press made it out to be. Like Ishtar or Showgirls (ah, Showgirls!), Gigli is a movie that everybody heard about and nobody saw: It's easy to throw stones at the "Bennifer" juggernaut that the National Enquirer put into overdrive when pre- Gigli fever hit fever pitch last year, but those lobbying bricks only cared about hitting their target, not why. It makes me think of my favorite quote by John Lennon about Yoko Ono: "She's the most dangerous kind of entertainer in the world - everybody knows who she is, but nobody knows what she does."

Don't get me wrong, though. Gigli is awful - really and truly misguided in almost every way - and one wonders at how Brest got actors like Al Pacino and Christopher Walken to take part in a movie that contains some of the most ludicrously unbelievable (and stilted) dialogue ever to hit the silver screen. (My guess is that they all said "Yes!" before reading the script), and why on Earth Revolution Studios and Columbia dropped a reported $60 million on such a weak concept. (Whomever greenlit this movie deserves to be bitch-slapped).

Yet despite the fact that Gigli has many a horrific scene doesn't mean that it is not at least moderately engrossing, as if it were a beautiful Georgia peach that so long ago rotted that the worms that teem from it are a brilliant shade of sour. To give it some props, it is competently photograph and the production design nice enough if banal. (Ben Affleck lives in what has to be the dullest-looking apartment in Los Angeles.) More surprising is that there is very little on-screen chemistry between Ben and Jennifer. (You know what they say - if you have stars who fall in love off-camera, their on- camera interaction will be dead on arrival.) Their banter is contrived, and already some has been entered into the camp hall of fame. Quote: as Jennifer seduces Ben, she utters the infamous line "It's turkey time - gobble gobble. Lay some of that hetero-lingus on me!" Eeek!

Yes, Gigli is bad. Real bad. But I dare those who have branded the movie with a scarlet letter for being "the worst movie ever" (it certainly is not) to deny that it wasn't really worth all the fuss. Its biggest crime is that it is insignificant. So leave it to the Hollywood PR machine to make a mere waste of time generates far more ink than it should have. Its star power and production values make it look on the surface like a Rolls- Royce, but this star vehicle should be up on cinder blocks on the front yard of an RV park. Gobble gobble.

Video: How Does The Disc Look?

Rejoice, all ye Gigli lovers: This 2.40:1 anamorphic widescreen presentation is top-notch. Black levels are spot-on, detail ample and the film's rather icky beige color scheme sharply rendered and consistent. Shadow delineation and contrast are also very, very good, with fine textures visible and little in the way of edge enhancement. Of course, it all begs the question - did Gigli even deserve a DVD release at all? But this transfer is pretty terrific, whether or not anyone will care.

Also included is a 4:3 pan & scan version on the flipside of the disc.

Audio: How Does The Disc Sound?

Just as sharp as the transfer. Again, the sound design is purposefully bland, so this one won't make much use out of your super-expensive 5.1 rig, but it is still impressive. Frequency response is excellent, with full highs and deep lows. Dialogue is masterfully recorded and reproduced, with distinct stereo separation across the front channels and the surrounds can be involving when they want to be. And even though the film's score is tremendously bad, it comes through wonderfully. Even the .1 LFE channel gets a mild workout. Who would have thought?

Also included is a French 5.1 Dolby Surround track, plus English, French, Chinese, Korean and Thai subtitles and English Closed Captions.

Supplements: What Goodies Are There?

What a surprise! All we get is a theatrical trailer in 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen, as well as additional previews for another J.Lo atrocity, Anaconda, plus Maid in Manhattan and the Bennifer-less Mona Lisa Smile.

DVD-ROM Exclusives: What do you get when you pop the disc in your PC?

There are no ROM extras on the disc.

Parting Thoughts