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The story of The Ring is absolutely absurd, if compelling in that goofy B-movie sorta way. Naomi Watts (of Mulholland Drive fame) stars as Rachel Keller, a rather lousy mother and workaholic who is investigating the mysterious death of her cousin. Seems kids are popping in a videotape, getting a phone call ("The ring!") that tells them they're gonna die in a week, and then - poof! Of course, being a stupid heroine in a horror movie, Rachel tracks down the tape and watches it. Then she gets the phone call (Ringggg!) and figures out she's next on the demonic VCR's hit list. With time running out, she only has seven days to unravel the mystery and save her son from certain doom. See, she should have bought a DVD player!

Yes, this is totally ludicrous, but then the best horror movies are always totally ludicrous. (Such silliness didn't stop The Exorcist from making a zillion dollars, now did it?) So as a devout fan of B-movie junk, I was completely sucked in by the first act of The Ring. Who wouldn't be curious to find out What Really Is On That Tape? While Rachel is quite the unsympathetic lead (Watts plays her like a bored PTA mom who looks like she just stepped out of a David Lynch movie), director Gore Verbinski is smart enough to know the real star of his movie is that videotape. The quick flashes of its mysterious contents are suitably creepy, and only Watt's do-nothing boyfriend and that bug-eyed kid (David Dorfman) irritate. (Why is it that every movie post-Sixth Sense has to have some catatonic toddler in it?) Also in the film's favor are the overall production values which are uniformly excellent, and I can't say I didn't want to stick around to see where it would all lead to in the Big Climax.

But seriously, is The Ring really the scariest motion picture since The Exorcist, as some have claimed? I must admit that by the middle of the movie I realized that there are so many mile-wide plot holes that it doesn't make any sense. I won't ruin the last third for you, but I just have to ask: If you were a mom and only had seven days to live, would you really dump your kid off all week with the babysitter? And has anyone else noticed that The Ring is essentially just a remake of that great old George C. Scott flick The Changeling, right down to the revelation of the The Big Mystery? I also question the motives of the evil forces/evildoer in this movie. What did he/she/they/it hope to gain with all this possessed videotape stuff? Why not just zap people with your magic death ray?

Perhaps I'm just asking too many questions of The Ring. (If I had a son as creepy as Watt's kid, I'd probably watch that videotape, too.) At least for once a big-budget Hollywood movie is trying to be scary, no questions asked. My guess is that its real appeal is due to the fact that everyone involved plays it totally straight. It's got some cool scenes, great atmosphere and for once isn't all about postmodern irony and hip humor. I'm not as sold on its merits as much as the film's ever-expanding cult, but at least for once we have a mainstream horror flick that matters. In any event, it's certainly better than FearDotCom...

Video: How Does The Disc Look?

Oooh, scary! The Ring is a one great-looking, moody little movie, and this is a great transfer. Presented here in 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen, DreamWorks has delivered another winner. Director Gore Verbinski, working with Bojan Bezelli (a cinematographer I am not familiar with), ups the eerieness with tons of filters and other photographic effects. This is a very dark film (even daylight scenes look like something out of a...horror movie) and just about the entire flick has a greenish-purple overcast to it. But this transfers it all beautifully, with an impeccable print that is surprisingly free of grain. Blacks are excellent, with contrast a bit on the flat side but it looks appropriate to the intended effect. Colors are muted for the most part, but vibrant in key moments where it counts (especially those beautiful shades of crimson). I suppose fleshtones are accurate, but it is such an intentionally moody film I'll just have to guess at that. There is also no real edge enhancement (only some of the more processed sequences and the video footage suffers from haloing), and given the lack of extras, the compression is topnotch. Great stuff.

Audio: How Does The Disc Sound?

Even scarier than the transfer is the audio mix, which gives The Ring the majority of its power. This is a cool soundtrack made even cooler with Dolby Digital and DTS options. The Ring is a very quiet/loud film, typical of most horror movies these days. Long, quiet passages lead up to the Big Scare, accompanied by the appropriate shock stinger to knock you out of your chair.

Thankfully resisting the urge to overdo it, this is a fairly restrained mix. The sparse music, dialogue and aggressive effects are perfectly balanced: Even with all the quiet passages, I never had to turn the volume down when the big scary moments came. Dynamic range is also excellent, especially the powerful low end. While I would have liked more ambiance (the surrounds only seem to kick in when the soundtrack gets loud) there are some noticeable discrete effects that really work.

Given the stop/start nature of the soundtrack, it was tough to compare the DTS and Dolby Digital tracks. The typical improvements DTS offers are in attendance. Slightly more pronounced detail in the surrounds, kickier low end and slightly expanded separation across the front channels. But since both are provided on the same disc, you don't have to choose either way. Fun stuff.

Also included are alternate Dolby Digital French 5.1 and English 2.0 surround tracks and English, French and Spanish subtitles. Like all DreamWorks titles, no true Closed Captions are provided.

Supplements: What Goodies Are There?

Even more perplexing than the mysteries of The Ring are just what is up with the extras on this DVD! Perhaps hoping to entice viewers with more intrigue, DreamWorks and director Gore Verbinski have eschewed the usual supplements like commentary, deleted scenes, etc., for only one featurette, the sinister Don't Watch This. Running 15 minutes, I can't say that I understand what the heck this is supposed to be. Essentially a digest version of the film, it's a bunch of clips and what looks like some deleted scene material. Sure, it's creepy like the film, but did I learn anything about anything watching this? Not really. I'm sure the film's growing legion of cultists and fans of Blair Witch-style conspiracies will pore over this, frame by frame, for more clues to the film's backstory. Me, I'd rather just watch the flick again.

The only other extras include is the Watch This trailer gallery, with an anamorphic trailer for Catch Me If You Can, and two non-anamorphic widescreen trailers for 8 Mile and the new-to-DVD Japanese Ringu. No trailers for The Ring itself are included. (For you adventurous viewers willing to risk their lives [Ringgggg!], there is a hidden easter egg here I'm sure you'll like. See if you can find it.)

DVD-ROM Exclusives: What do you get when you pop the disc in your PC?

No ROM extras have been included.

Parting Thoughts