Never one to shy away from horrifically awful films, I was
actually excited to see the box office disaster The Adventures of
Pluto Nash on my list of movies to review this week. As half of the
one-two punch that ruined Eddie Murphy's year (I Spy also tanked),
this sci-fi blunder typifies the worst aspects of modern big-budget
filmmaking: Inept screenwriting, a wasted cast, and production design
that literally makes no sense whatsoever. Believe what you've heard:
It's that bad.
My roommate and I watched this film in
the fashion all terrible films should be watched: We incorporated a
drinking game to go along with the pain and misery. We drank whenever
a horrifically loud pop-music cue came in (more on that later) and -
at my sadistic request - every time we were so aghast at the film's
complete ineptitude that we couldn't believe what we were seeing.
Surprise, surprise...we got trashed. My first shocking moment
of disbelief came when Randy Quaid showed up as a bodyguard robot
whose voice is transfigured through the same talk-box Cher's voice
went through in "Believe". He beeps and squeaks like the bad
robot from The Black Hole with no discernible irony whatsoever. Chug!
After that horrific introduction, we drank whenever another
celebrity would show up and be embarrassingly wasted. Let's see: Joe
Pantoliano is here, as the thug boss who wants nothing more than to
blow Eddie Murphy's Pluto Nash to atoms. I don't know whether it was
his awful, awful wig, his terribly inappropriate Al Capone get-up, or
his dreadful dialogue, but this usually capable character actor was
reduced to nothing but embarrassing one-liners and super-histrionic
sneers. Chug! 
Then there's Rosario Dawson, an actress who
seems to be making a name for herself by wasting her novice talents on
spaced-out supporting sorta-characters (she was also inert in Men in
Black II and Josie and the Pussycats). But I can say this about her
performance here: My roommate and I didn't drink to her ridiculousness
until the very end of the film where she turns into a futuristic
Gloria Gaynor on a space-disco stage. Ugh - it still hurts. Chug!
Oh, wait, I can't forget John Cleese as the electronic taxi driver
(being a terrible film is one thing, but stealing obviously from Total
Recall is quite another) who spouts his tired British-isms as Eddie
Murphy drives his CG space-car over and around the futuristic moon's
crappily-designed craters. I think we drank as he gasped in horror as
his taxi - warp-drive boosters in effect - took about forty seconds to
fly in slow motion over a small canyon. Chug!
Let's wrap this
up. Pam Grier as the ghetto-feisty mama of Mr. Nash? Chug! Luis Guzman
as a space-age trailer-trash nomad in a lunar Winnebago? Chug! Alec
Baldwin as a Mafioso back on Earth who "accidentally" pushes
a reporter to his death down a flight of marble stairs, all the while
spouting a terrible Italian accent? Chug!
I think that's it,
but if you're curious, I won't be able to stop you from renting this.
And if you were (gasp!) one of the two people who actually saw Pluto
Nash in theaters and found it to be a breath of ridiculous fresh air,
this DVD - as slight and shoddy as it might be - is going to be the
best you'll ever get. That is, until the 3-disc The Adventures of
Pluto Nash Criterion Collection edition. Right? 
Video: How
Does The Disc Look?
Presented in its original 1.85:1
theatrical aspect ratio, this transfer is pretty good. The film uses a
lot of muted colors in the realization of its futuristic world, so
this isn't as eye-popping as one would think. Contrast is a bit high,
with perhaps too-bright whites, but detail remains strong.
Unfortunately, shadow delineation suffers a bit as blacks, usually
rich and deep, occasionally come off as a bit gray, giving some scenes
a washed-out look. Otherwise, a fairly good transfer, if not great.
Audio: How Does The Disc Sound?
Okay. Presented
in 5.1 Dolby surround, this is a fairly good soundtrack. The music, as
I mentioned before, is balanced way too loud in the mix, and
unfortunately, the film's worst aspect may be its John Powell score.
(One of the worst ever!) But at least dynamic range is pretty good,
and there are some nice stereo and discrete rear effects. The .1 LFE
is fairly strong, giving the film a full sound despite the blaring
music. At the very least, the physical pain you'll feel watching this
film will at least sound pretty good.
Also included is a French
5.1 surround dub. English, French and Spanish subtitles as well as
English Closed Captioning are also included.
Supplements:
What Goodies Are There?
Not a lot. We have
"exclusive" additional scenes that are as abhorrent
and unwatchable as anything in the rest of the film. Skip them. There
is also the obligatory short making-of featurette that is total
PR fluff, the IMX "Ain't No Need" music video (blah),
and a short 2-minute making-of the music video. Nope, no trailers.
Yay.
DVD-ROM Exclusives: What do you get when you pop the
disc in your PC?
There is an interface that pops up with
DVD controls and embedded weblinks to Warner websites.
Parting Thoughts
A movie that can't be forgotten too
quickly, The Adventures of Pluto Nash is as bad a film as you're ever
likely to see. A $100 million loser for Warner, and speaking as one
who takes glee in a super-sized Hollywood folly, I can't deny that
there is some appeal to fast-forwarding through the film and making
your own 10-minute cut. But for those actually expecting a cohesive
and understandable film? Run - run NOW!
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